“So who am I now?”

A very very cruel disease for anyone who is affected by it, whether it be the person who has it, or their loved ones.


Dementia is cruel. It robs the individual of themselves, slowly, gradually. Their memories, their roles, their skills. Their ability to remember the name of the person or people closest to them. Their relationship to those people. Sometimes, they can become so distressed by this that they no longer feel safe with their loved ones, leading to them to display hostile behaviours in a bid to keep themselves safe – if there was a man you didn’t recognise in your bed, wouldn’t you want him out? Wouldn’t you hit out, shout, scream? Call the police?

As a health professional working with such situations, I have explained this many times to many families, in terms of the impact to the person with dementia. Having read other blogs by those caring for loved ones with dementia who no longer recognise them, I realise that we don’t often put emphasis on the family member…

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